....lowly yet humble

I super-rush into my apartment to write..feels like the perfect moment, with so much to write about…(Time and Chance**winks**winks)

I kind’a feel at my lowest in an ironic and in grateful way;  a different society….Am not sure of how many people leave the status-quo(what they taught was good) for something more. But then to get the more, you kind’a have to start afresh, in a lowly way yet in a humbling form. The idea of having a Job that could at-least get you through most of your bills and having to move to trusting God totally for as little as a bus-fare (it's not like i didn’t trust God before; i was somewhat self-dependent….), having to wait on people, been under the rain twice at a bust-stop with no shed(..lol..even when no one stopped to give you a ride), thinking you knew so much, but having to learn stuff you know and more afresh, used to being in charge; now having to watch and follow…but yet with humility and a joy in it all.

With all of my friends and buddies quite older than i am, some free knowledge and experience always available, learning and wanting to gain knowledge; I always wanted to be able to give back, but never expected it would come in this way…at a point I struggled with some form of pride (feeling more than the situation warranted, probably trying to show some class), I have learnt and am learning humility in my lowest form.. For me it’s not about the material things, it’s about the immaterial…..I probably used to be proud of the knowledge I had…cos I always got more and thought I knew more…now I’ve got to give what I know and am learning at the same time, mentoring in-directly and delivering at my lowest form… Amidst all of these, I feel a need to serve…I write in my note several times the line “”Living a spent life””… how I want to serve and die empty, how I want to give till there’s nothing; now the irony of it all is,  this burden of serving comes when i feel at my lowest, where it’s like am starting from scratch and I have little to give… so I serve, yet I don’t feel service is enough…so I keep serving *smile

Hmmm...I have learnt to be God confident and God dependent in all of this; I can’t explain it in words…the saying of “when you are down to nothing, God is up to something” is super true in my life. I have learnt to trust God with my last cent. For me it’s all a process, and never an end. Am smiling and thinking about Living the experience of the Apostles in these days..*do not be too excited..there are 2 sides to it***winks**

I pray earnestly about God’s Kingdom coming, and God’s will to be done in the earth. A while back I kept hearing God tell me about “Global Impact”. I see God as sovereign; more than a time or place or a city or a country, I understand that Christ came not for the Jews alone, but for all, I understand that God has called us to a Global ministry, where we serve the world, pray for the world, intercede for those we see and do not see. Recently when I hear about killings or bombings or shootings, i don’t freak out o!(Amazingly I’m super-calm in my spirit, not out of lack of compassion); it’s majorly because I’ve got confidence that there’s a God that rules and reigns in the affairs of men, he is the God in whom all flesh would come to, he is super aware and even knows before-hand all that’s happening , it’s all in his book and we are characters in this story, playing our roles per time; I understand that it might and will get worse…..Yet in all of this,  we are more than Conquerors. Wow!

 So I pray that daily our lives would be worthy of his calling, and we would live every moment in his precept; amidst our desires and wants ; that we will honour his will, that he would grant us the Grace to serve in every way possible. That our lives would be spent loving the way he loved us, that the Kingdom of God would come, that his will be done in every continent, country and city; that the kingdom of this world would be the kingdom of our God and of his Christ… that we would get that grand welcome from our Lord and saviour when it’s all been said and done.

I’ve been more conscious about my motives lately..lol. God taught me about Love and am learning to live that Love. God is teaching me to Love in a way that I give and not expect anything in return…Oopss..yes totally giving . I was told awhile back by a friend that nice isn’t being Christian, well recently God brought that back to me; adding also that the feeling of doing something good doesn’t necessarily mean what we did was good…eventually all that matters is we Love, truly and wholly, the way God did…with the motive of glorifying God and expecting nothing in return.

I’ll tell you the truth, I think am on a new journey in God’s book; where am a character. So in all of this I hang on to God’s Grace, trusting God to help me follow through and be worthy of the calling.

So, if you’ll please join me in praying for God’s kingdom to come and that God’s will reigns, also that every Christian would be worthy of their calling, that we all would live our parts and that our lives would show forth God , through and through. Please pray for the world, for the countries, for those being persecuted, for Christians struggling with one thing or the other…

…and yes Pray that we all would grow and mature into the image and stature of the son of God.

Till I write again; keep living and loving the God way……